Egyptis Pivot

Doubts

 

This is one of the children of Emerald and Star

I was doubting.  I was doubting myself, and everything around me.  What really mattered?  What was really important?  How would I survive?  I knew that that time had come, that time when I had to leave.  I would be alone and everyone would forget me.  How would I survive?  Before they came along it was easy to survive, because I knew not what I was missing.  But now that I had had them, now that I would know what was missing in my life, it would hurt.  It would kill me.

One day while resting, alone at home for the first time in a long time, I fell asleep.  My fears, my doubts, were becoming reality.  But falling asleep was very easy to do, the only way to escape.  My eyelids closed, and I was at once at peace with the rest of the world.

My dreams, like my sleep, were peaceful.  There were flowing streams and wild flowers blowing gaily in fresh crisp meadows.  But in the distance, there was a gloomy forest, full of hopelessness and despair.  In my dream, I dared not go into that dreadful place.  Yet something called me towards it.

Despite my greatest efforts, I saw myself going towards it, interested and intrigued.  And the closer I got, the less dangerous and devastating it looked.  In fact, it looked peaceful and full of serenity.  I ventured in, filled immediately with sorrow and hopelessness.  The forest had a melancholy yet peaceful air, but one felt complied to be sad when inside it.  The withered trees seemed to be just mere remembrances of times long past.  They were giants in their time, but no longer.  They grew no leaves, and were bent and crooked.

A misty haze hung in the air, filled with glum and sorrow.  It was not cool and refreshing, but hot and sticky.  It carried with it rest and sleep, but dread also was concealed in it.  Dread that what is here today will not be around tomorrow.  Dread that all things good do not last.  I could not help feeling sorry for the forest.

It was in this dreary place where I happened along a sleeping, full grown Egyptis.  She was amazingly colored, I had never seen another like her.  I did not know what she was doing in the forest, one so full of color did not seem to belong in this place.  Quietly I approached her and looked down at her to make sure she was not dead...  Eventually her eyelids fluttered open, and she looked at me while a sad expression danced across her face.

"Am I dead?" she asked.  I looked at her, surprised.  It felt funny to be surprised in such a place.

"No, your not dead," I responded, "though I had though you were."

"I was told there would be no others.  I thought, perhaps, that I had past on.  But no, I recognize it now.  The trees, the mist, I am not dead."  I looked at her.  She seemed filled with a knowledge of this forsaken place.  "What are you doing in the Forest of Lamentation?" she inquired.

"I don't know.  I felt drawn to it.  It was calling to me."

"Someone has died?" she asked, her eyes filled with sorrow.

"No," I replied.  "No one has died.  But I'm alone."  She looked at me again, her eyes seemingly pulled into mine.  She looked into my heart, into my soul.

"You are not alone," she concluded.  But then she added "But you feel that you soon will be.  You feel unneeded, unwanted.  You don't want to be alone."  I nodded my head.  "Then you shan't be, not yet anyways."  She pulled out a soft white cocoon, and set it gently in my arms.  "She will keep you, if you keep her.  But she will grow slowly, so that you will not feel alone for a long time.  She is one of my own, of my clutch.  Never let go of life, and always believe."  My eyes filled with tears, and I threw my arms around her.

 

Name: Unknown
Gender: Female
Age: Cocoon
Tribe: Unknown
Abilities: Unknown

"Thank you, Emerald"  Though she had not said her name, I knew it somehow.  It was as if we connected, as if we bonded.  But the friendship wasn't a reality, it was a dream.  I seemed to know this as well, and dreaded then waking up and discovering that I was alone.  She looked at me, and seemed to know that I feared this.

"Do not trouble.  Your questions have been answered, and your wishes granted.  You will never be alone.  Not while you believe."  I sighed, contented that there was a power out there greater then mine, and that it would see me through, and never abandon me to loneliness and despair.  "Then awake!"  As she said this, I felt myself leaving the dream world.  I awoke with a start.

I felt something only slightly heavy in my lap.  I looked down, and saw the precious cacoon that would accompany me in the days ahead.

CUB